I have to admit that I was expecting to have more clarity on where we are going as a whole by now. Yes, I was expecting a clearer view, a sparkling horizon of possibilities. Instead I am still confronted with a blurry and unstable vision of where I am going. And yes, I know that we are on the precipice of a major change and that all the chaos we are going through is necessary to get to this brand new world that we are dreaming into being. I know all that. It is a truth settled deep in my being. And that is where I have to go, deep within myself, to keep my focus, to not get lost in the chaos.
It is a tricky landscape we are navigating. There is so much uncertainty, confusion and chaos that it sometimes seems impossible to stay focused. Sometimes the blurriness seems so vast that it sucks you right in. I know, because it happens to me too. But, you know, just like a camera can be adjusted to get a clear picture, so can we.
What I have noticed over the past few weeks is that there is one thing that is extremely important on this journey, and that is exactly what I started this story with: "I was expecting..." Indeed it is only because the world does not correspond to what I was expecting it to be that I get lost in the blurriness. Our expectations are making the landscape even more tricky, more challenging to navigate. Adjusting our lens means going inward to land in the now. Not even tomorrow, not even tonight, not even the next minute, but now. And when we keep adjusting our lens like this, we create this string of nows. And suddenly we notice that the blurriness shifts and our landscape becomes more focused.
I have had some challenging moments in the past few weeks, tempted to just get lost in the blurriness., tired of the chaos. In those moments I am mad at the world, mad at Covid and mad at myself. I feel myself going into frustration and judgment and I just want my expectations to be fulfilled. I start doubting myself and everything that I believe in. I start questioning the Universe. I want clarity and I want it now. Expectations...
And that is when I have to rely on everything I learned on my journey. That is when I know that I have to go inward to find my focus again. Because my Self knows where I am going. My Self is not affected by the blurriness and the chaos. Inside is where I find all the answers that I need and as always one of the answers is: "let go of your expectations and ride the wave". We are all riding the wave into a new way of living and it is important that we focus and refocus over and over again. Yes, we may get lost in the blurriness for a while, but at some point we have to take ourselves by the hand and adjust that lens back into focus. Let's keep focusing on that horizon until it becomes crystal clear and sparkling with possibilities. Because those possibilities and opportunities are there, behind all that chaos and blurriness and if we keep focusing we will see them sharp and clear.
When the world becomes too blurry, let's go inward and find that focus again. What I did over the past few weeks is that I took up yoga again (Youtube sessions), did some guided meditations, went out in nature to reconnect, tried some new, healthy recipes, did some painting (creative and meditative at the same time!) and gave y body a rest when it needed it. And here I am today, writing this blog, refocused and inspired. We are on this journey together, my friends, so let's help each other find our focus and see all the possibilities that are there for us.
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